Archive for September, 2009
singing once again
Many, many years ago I was in a little musical about immigrants coming to America. It was 5th grade. I had my first duet, I was dressed as an Irish girl, and the feeling of excitement started building as I stood on stage and started singing the first notes. At all of 10 years old, I felt I had found a new way to express myself, a new activity to love and enjoy. I felt I could do something worthwhile.
Since that moment, I continued to sing in church, a music visions program, throughout my junior high school years, and eventually ending up in the top choir at my high school. Here is where I had most of my success - making All-State chorus three years in a row, as a sophmore being chosen among hundreds of students to sing at a special concert at Carnegie Hall, and as a senior being elected by my fellow choir members to sing the senior solo in the final song of our last concert of the year.
While I don’t have a tremendous voice, at least not one that I could have built a career around, I enjoyed every second I was singing. It was a break from the regular academics and allowed me to learn about other facets of my personality and talent. It helped develop the person I have become and gave me the opportunity to be a more well-rounded individual.
Since I graduated high school, I have missed singing. Not necessarily by myself, truth is I much prefer being one voice in a group of voices. At one point in college I even tried singing a semester in a local community choir. While I enjoyed and appreciated that experience it just did not feel like a good fit for me.
I was sitting in church not too long ago and the sermon was on stewardship. The focus of the sermon though did not rest solely on finances as those types of sermons usually tend to. The point was stressed that all that we are and all that we have is the Lord’s and so when giving of ourselves in any way we are really only allowing God to use what is already His. Our pastor put it in these terms of thinking of God as the owner or board of trustees and we are merely the managers. He also emphasized that whatever we have, whatever we possess, whether it is finances, skills, talents, or anything else, should always be used to serve Him.
As I thought about this, I thought about how my average talent and above average joy of singing both belong to God and I just had not been allowing him to use them for His glory. So in a bold move for me I have joined our church choir. What better way to get involved in an activity that I’ve loved and missed and also praise God for all He has done and continues to do in my life? So far I have attended one rehearsal and served in the choir one Sunday. I only pray that this experience will continue to allow me to worship Him in new ways while also expanding His opportunity to use me and my average, ordinary talent for His extraordinary mission. But whatever comes of this, I just know that for now I am growing my capacity to love and serve our Lord and I am doing it by singing once again.
Look, the highest heavens and the earth and everything in it all belong to the Lord your God. ~ Deuteronomy 10:14
For this, O Lord, I will praise you among the nations;I will sing praises to your name. ~ 2nd Samuel 22:50
the heart of africa
I have been absent from this site for almost a month now. It seems most of my spare moments recently are either spent sleeping or in full zone-out, crash mode. The daily routine has grinded down my energy and I have started to feel a little like a tired mouse on a wheel. Running and running, never going anywhere, but can’t stop the motion…
Until an idea came to me. For months now I have been considering how I can get involved in more things that will encourage, uplift, and help other people. How can I see more of the world doing this? How can I test and improve myself so that I break the redundant motion of the wheel? How can I refresh and renew my spirit? And then it came to me, a volunteer vacation might be just the ticket. After much consideration and prayer over the last few months I have determined that my answer lies somewhere in the heart of Africa.
Yes, I know – a little risky, actually quite a bit risky. Thinking about the disease, the poverty, the crime, the war, the sadness, the hunger of the people of Africa is a daunting challenge for me to wrap my little mind around. I definitely have concerns about my well-being and safety. There’s also a financial issue involved – it’s not necessarily cheap to help people in a third world country. However, despite these seemingly insurmountable odds, I can’t help but think about the possibility that by me taking a risk and sacrificing finances and comfort, that God may use me in incredible ways there. I can’t help but think about, if I don’t take this opportunity now while I’m young and unattached, what regret will fill my heart.
I have been reading up on Africa and researching the history, politics, and any other random information that may prove useful on this journey. The more I read, the more I realize how difficult this journey may be. And while some have thought that I’m a little crazy for wanting to put myself in the middle of known dangers, I came across the following excerpt in a book that I thought to be the best summary of my thoughts and feelings about this trip and for that matter life in general:
“At times like this in life I usually found myself asking why. Why do people do this? Why do we invite trials, frustrations, and discomfort? Why do we intentionally put ourselves in situations that we know will push us beyond where we like to be pushed, to places we know will be tough?
Maybe, I finally resolved, there isn’t one simple answer, just a longing to be tested and proven. A desire to know that we can overcome whatever obstacle we may be forced to face. It is only when we are pushed past our self-perceived limits that we are able to clearly see our truest nature, discover our deepest selves, only then can we hope to improve upon what we find. To do so is neither safe nor comfortable, it is both dangerous and scary. But we warriors at heart were meant to live dangerously.”
~Erik Mirandette from The Only Road North
So while there is still more to learn and plan before visiting this mysterious center of the world I do hope that if I do manage to coordinate a trip that God will keep me safe and use my time there for His will. That I will not only have the time of my life, but that I will improve upon myself while helping improve others’ lives. Even the smallest things can become the biggest miracles for some. I will continue to post developments about this ongoing adventure…
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Six essential qualities that are the key to success: Sincerity, personal integrity, humility, courtesy, wisdom, charity.
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