Life after a breakup can be hard. It is a readjustment to life. It is the feeling that when you went into the relationship you were a whole person but somehow coming back out of it you are only a half. He became my other half and I miss that half.
But slowly and surely I am recovering. I’ve shed a few tears, had my angry thoughts, dreamt about what could have been and I now find myself beginning to come out on the other side. Not to say that I can get over it in just a few short weeks, I mean it was 4 1/2 years of my life, but I know life goes on and I must go with it.
It is a strange thought that someone who has been so close and with whom I’ve shared so much for so many years will no longer be around – or at least not to the capacity that he was before. No more Friday night movies or morning phone calls. No more workday emails or saying just the right thing to make me smile at the end of a bad day. But I know at some point in the future the reason for this will become quite clear. Someday I’ll realize that there is something/someone else meant for me.
When that moment arrives, I’ll look back on this relationship as a learning experience. It will always be a moment in time that God put us together intentionally to face the difficulties of those years together. This relationship is something I had to go through in order for Him to get me to be where He wants me to be.
But until that time comes, I’m trying to remember what life was like before the relationship. I’m spending more time with friends and family (I thank the Lord for these people). These individuals have gone out of their way to make sure that my social calendar remains full and they are ever ready with a listening ear. I appreciate their love and care through this. As always, I can count on them – they never let me down.
As for him, I wish him the best that life has to offer. He is a wonderful man with a tremendous heart. Unfortunately it seemed to be the walls around that heart that I could not break through. I do hope he finds what he is looking for.